IF you had the time to sit through my woes, Kelly could tell you all about my bad luck.
You know the script – too fat, too slow, too short, too ugly, evil wife etc etc.
In reality, the list is longer than the runway at Heathrow Airport, but the tears are landing on my keyboard.
But I have to say that, on some days, this can be a cush
y job.
I've covered a couple of Rugby World Cups and been to the likes of Bath, Gloucester, Harlequins, Leicester and Wasps and all that jazz.
I've had a free ride on a train or a lift off Frank Reid without any troublesome petrol money arguments.
Kelly has also reported on some great nights of Hartlepool boxing – ABA championships, British, Commonwealth, European, World title fights, watching the likes of Kevin Bennett, Ian Cooper, Michael Hunter, Alan Temple and Nigel Wright going for glory.
But in all my 14 years of covering Hartlepool's boxing stars I've never seen a punchfest like this one.
It only went one round and there were no knock-downs.
Kelly's talking about the ferocious heavyweight confrontation between Simon Bunting (Sheffield Tigers) and Anth Carr (West Hartlepool).
The pair traded blow for blow at Dore Moor in the North Division One "battle" until they were eventually separated by a small battalion of UN peace-keeping troops.
Don't for one minute think I'm advocating punches on a rugby pitch because I'm not.
But it did not escalate ito a team brawl – it was just two fellas having a stand-up fight and, to be fair, they were very good at it. No-one got hurt.
A couple of old school refs I know wouldn't have even carded them and probably just given them a sarcastic "when you've finished your fight lads, the rest of us are trying to play a game of rugby here", something like that.
Some refs may have also chosen to sin-bin them and let them cool off for 10 minutes.
Unfortunately – for Bunting and Carr and ultimately the spectators – Paul Baynes chose to send them off.
With his two assessors just yards away, the Cambridgeshire official probably had no alternative.
The funny thing was there was a total lack of acrimony after the incident.
Unlike football when you hear of "afters" in the tunnel, dressing room, players' bar etc, Carr wandered straight over to shake hands and the opponents embraced.
Of course, it's great there was no malice but the true lesson here is to keep your fists in your pocket.
And, to continue on the subject of fisticuffs and red cards, there was another for one of our rugby stars at the weekend – and there's a twist in this tale.
Rovers coach Craig Lee was sent off by referee Paul Richardson during his team's 33-20 victory at Ryton.
Now, anyone who knows Lee is well aware that the only fighting Craig does is fires.
He couldn't fight sleep bless him. Craig was actually sent off for trying to BREAK UP a brawl.
The Cleveland fireman saw his free-scoring hooker Jonathan Cushlow taking a few bats on the deck and came onto the field to prevent any more.
That, to me, is good play and poor refereeing.
