Hartlepool woman to carry Baton of Hope in memory of son who took his own life

Matt Blair was a “wonderful young man” with a wicked sense of humour, who loved helping people.

But he sadly took his own life in June 2021 aged 29 after battling with mental health since his teenage years.

Now his mother Jo Darby is trying to be Matt’s legacy by raising awareness for mental health and ‘making the uncomfortable conversation comfortable’.

“Matt was the youngest of my three children. He leaves behind an older brother and sister,” Jo said.

"He was 17 when we first noticed a change in his mood and mental wellbeing.

"Matt was always a sensitive and kind young man. He had a wicked sense of humour. He worked as a personal trainer and took great pride in helping others manage their health and wellbeing. Unfortunately he just wasn't so good at managing his own.

"We always wished Matt could see himself through our eyes for the wonderful young man he was and how much he was/is loved. Unfortunately he couldn't. Matt eventually took his life aged 29.

"By raising awareness I want to be Matt's legacy. To leave his footprint and hopefully make a difference.”

Jo is one of 50 people impacted by suicide, who are set to carry the Baton of Hope when the event reaches Newcastle on Tuesday, June 27.

The baton will tour 12 UK cities from Glasgow to London with the aim of eliminating stigma surrounding suicide.

“It's about raising awareness. It's about making that uncomfortable conversation comfortable,” Jo, 55, said.

"People don't want to talk about suicide, it's a very uncomfortable conversation.

"It's in memory of Matt, but it's also raising that awareness that people shouldn't be afraid to talk about it and to say if they're having those thoughts and feelings.

"I guess it's also trying to keep that on the agenda for the Government. I think our mental health services are in crisis. They're just not good enough. They're not doing the preventative stuff. Everything's about crisis management and people are really struggling.”

Losing a loved one to suicide brought Jo together with Tracy Smith and Scott McCabe.

They have been facilitating Hartlepool SOBS, a peer-to-peer support group for people open to everyone over the age 18 who has been bereaved by suicide.

Sessions take place on the first Tuesday of every month from 6.30pm till 8pm in Hartlepool town centre.

“Suicide grief is very unique,” Jo said.

"It throws a lot of questions and would've, could've, should've. Could I have done more? Could I have said more? Grief does stay with you for a long time but I think when you are bereaved by suicide, there's a lot of guilt, you worry about being judged by people.

“The group is open to anybody, no matter how long ago it happened.

“Everybody is very positive about it and they are saying it's what's needed. The people that have come found it a very positive experience. We will keep going with it in the hope that as time goes on more and more people will feel comfortable about coming along.”

Contact Hartlepool SOBS on [email protected] or 07940 558517.

The Samaritans can be contacted online at https://www.samaritans.org/ or call 116 123.